"Name what?"
"Your foot."
"Huh??"
"Paul Bunion! Get it? Hahaha!"
That was a conversation I had with the V.P. of my department the other day. He's known for being kind of kooky, and regularly makes bad jokes. I'm constantly amazed at the amount of lame jokes the word bunion inspires. I've been hearing a lot lately, as it's now public knowledge within my company that I'll be taking time off soon for this surgery. Not a bad thing... actually it's kind of nice, because my work load has diminished greatly while we get the other admin geared up to take on the full work load.
I bring all of this up because I had my pre-op appointment today for my bunion surgery. I will be getting the modified lapidus procedure. If you're at all curious what this procedure is all about, check out this link. Warning: graphic surgical photos and mucho doctor speak!
The good news is that my recovery will not be as bad as I thought. I thought I was in for 2 weeks of couch rest, followed by 6 weeks of non-weight bearing. Actually, I'll be non-weight bearing for two weeks - but able to hobble around with crutches. And then I will get the Boot and will be able to put weight on my heel, and eventually add more and more weight. Doc said I would be in the boot for 2-3 months total. He also said that I would be able to go to work after a week, but it would be better if I waited two weeks. So two weeks it is! Hopefully I'll be working from home after a few days though. I've burned up all of my PTO, so I'll need the money!
The bad news is that the pre-op procedure is going to suck! Hopefully, I'll get the morning surgery spot, because I won't be able eat for 8 hours before the surgery. And then the last 2 hours, I can't eat or drink anything. I can't even chew gum or suck on hard candy. Anyone who knows me well, knows this is going to be hard for me. I know a lot of people wake up from anaesthesia sick to their stomach, but I have a feeling I am going to be STARVING. Vanessa, we might need to have some snacks ready in the car!
The surprising news is that my Doctor wrote me prescription for my post-op pain... and he gave me SIXTY oxycodones. I've never had surgery, but this seems like a lot to me. This says one of two things - My doctor expects me to be in a hell of a lot of pain for many days. OR My doctor is an extremely nice man. I mean, even if I took one every four hours, it would take me 10 days to go through all of that. I REALLY REALLY hope I don't need them that long. I will try to switch to Advil as quickly as possible.
So that's pretty much it. It was a really quick appointment. I was actually surprised that they didn't take any blood or anything. I did have to sign a form saying I would accept a blood transfusion if necessary (in the event of an emergency.) But how will they know what type of blood I would need? I don't know even know my own blood type. Hmmm. It all seemed so non-chalant. There is something both disconcerting and comforting about how casual doctors and nurses are sometimes. Disconcerting because - HELLO - you are cutting me open and rearranging my bones! It's an all-day decision for me just to rearrange my blog! On the other hand, it's comforting to know that my doctor has done so many of these surgeries that for him it's about as big a deal as me opening up my email in the morning.
Just another day at the office...
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